14 books about living life on your own terms for 4,000 subscribers (+ exclusive paid subscriber perks)
A book roundup, thank you for 4,000 subscribers, and introducing exclusive paid subscriber perks
From my first post just four months ago, a review of Hello Beautiful by Ann Napolitano, we’re now at over 4,000 subscribers and I am so very grateful for each of you. For perspective, that’s over 33 lecture halls, dozens of cafés, and hundreds of book clubs, all filled with people connected by a shared love for reading. I started Reads With Alicia simply because I love books and wanted to share my personal reflections on them—I am incredibly grateful to do just that with you.
I dream often about opening a cosy bookshop of my own (with a little café serving matcha crepe cake, teas in cute English teacups, and coffee in chunky mugs), one that can be a warm community centre for people. I like to think of Reads With Alicia as an online manifestation of that—a little bookish space where we can gather to share great reads together.
It would be a tad cheesy to mark this milestone with a list of books about chasing your dreams, but I would like to share 14 books about living life on your own terms.
Before jumping into the list, I want to introduce exclusive paid subscriber perks.
Exclusive paid subscriber perks
I love sharing book reviews and roundups with you, and I want to make Reads With Alicia even more valuable and engaging. That’s why I’m introducing exclusive perks for paid subscribers—so you can get even more out of our book-loving community while supporting my work that goes into it.
Posts will be free for everyone for the first week, then they’ll be archived for paid members only. By upgrading, you’ll get:
full archive access—never miss a book review or roundup!
book club questions—perfect thought generators for solo readers or group discussions
author deep dives—for each book, I share research about the writers behind the writing, their influences, and plenty of fun facts
personalised book recommendations—tell me what you love, and I’ll find your next great read
With that, here are 14 books that inspire me to live the life I want! These books explore what happens when we define what makes a good life for ourselves, with characters both fictional and real who chart their own paths.
I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.
Roundup: 14 books about living life on your own terms
1. Butter by Asako Yuzuki
Considering this is about a serial killer (loosely inspired a true story), I hope you don’t take this the wrong way. But Manako’s utter disdain and disregard for society’s opinions of her body, taking ownership and control of this narrative, is quite admirable. The other, less murderous, characters also choose their own paths, including Reiko, whom I initially underestimated. In the context of a prescriptive east Asian society, the message in Butter is all the more powerful. Read my full review here.
2. Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata
A simple yet impactful story about deciding for yourself what happiness means. It reminds me of a mentor of mine, who always tells me that success is whatever I choose it to be. In this book, Reiko gives in to societal expectations by attempting to secure a husband despite being perfectly content as a single woman working at a convenience store. I won’t spoil it for you, but let’s just say that if you’re looking for permission to ignore what society tries to impose on you, this book is for you.
3. Diary of a Void by Emi Yagi
Whilst pretending to be pregnant for nine months may not be the best idea, this book is incredible. Why are women’s worth tied to reproduction? Why are we treated differently depending on whether we decide to conform to, or eschew, expectations that really don’t affect other people? What does it feel like to do something just because we want to, caring little about the consequences?
4. Educated by Tara Westover
Tara’s memoir has so much love and bravery. It takes great courage to break away from one’s family and community to live a life that’s completely apart from everything and everyone you’ve ever known, and Tara did just that. This book pushes us to think and question for ourselves and pursue what is right for us while being fully aware of the costs.
5. Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman
This book took the world by storm a few years ago and got me reading consistently again after years of surviving on brief summer reading sprints. Eleanor moves through life without conforming to society’s expectations, whether in relationships, work, or personal habits. Her journey reminds us that there’s no ‘right’ way to exist and that embracing who we are can lead to wonderful results.
6. Haben: The Deafblind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law by Haben Girma
Literally no one has done what Haben has. The memoir brings us from summers with family in Eritrea to Harvard Law as its first Deafblind graduate, meeting President Obama at The White House, and many adventures. Haben is a disability rights advocate and a force to be reckoned with.
7. Heartburn by Nora Ephron
A ‘thinly disguised’ book about Nora’s own divorce, it clearly bears her wit, ability to find comedy in tragedy, and not give a shit about what others think. The main character, as is Nora, is her own woman. Read my full review, with book club questions and an author deep dive, here.
8. I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman
It is strange to speak of autonomy in a post-apocalyptic world, but that is exactly what the Child narrator lives out. Unlike the other women, she has no strings to the previous reality and is free to make of the current world as she sees fit. Read my full review here.
9. Private Revolutions by Yuan Yang
Being a woman anywhere isn’t easy; even more so in China, where people’s lives are contained within vast systems. The four women whose stories we learn about were born in the 1980s and 1990s into different regions of mainland China and socioeconomic classes. They show us expectations and how each person’s role as a cog in the giant machinery; we then see how each woman, in her own way, navigates the system and tries to make it better for herself and her community. The stories are so real that I have had to check, multiple times including today, whether the book is fiction or non-fiction. Yuan is a former Financial Times China correspondent, which might explain the vividness of her writing.
10. Rental Person Who Does Nothing by Shoji Morimoto
I don’t understand Shoji’s life. I could not do what he does and do not want to. I deeply enjoyed his memoir. Shoji’s vocation is exactly the title of his book. He quite literally rejects any expectations placed on him, and this gave me much to reflect on.
11. Sweet Bean Paste by Durian Sukegawa
Here is a book about understanding people and lives different from your own. The main character starts off apprehensive of the old lady who offers to make sweet bean paste for his dorayaki in the back where no one can see her, and whilst I was initially worried it would become ableist, the book unfolded in such a beautiful way and shows just how far a bit of openness and empathy can go.
12. Takeaway: Stories from a Childhood Behind the Counter by Angela Hui
Okay, this book is a bit of a sneaky addition as much of what I love about Angela’s memoir is informed by her other work. She brilliantly shows us what it was like growing up in a Chinese takeaway, and beyond that, challenges stereotypes and assumptions about takeaways, reclaiming the narrative. Angela is an accomplished writer and, amongst many other things, has just started a supper club in Cardiff. She is also a really kind, supportive person.
13. The View From Down Here: Life as a Young Disabled Woman by Lucy Webster
14. Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop by Hwang Bo-Reum
A gentle book infused with bravery. The main character dares to leave all she knows—and all society approves of—behind to forge her own path. In doing so, she finds healing, community, and books. Read my full review here.
All the book reviews I’ve published in the last four months
I’m really proud I’ve written and published 15 book reviews in four months, with many more in the pipeline, in addition to lots of mini reviews in my roundups. It’s a privilege to share them with you.
Have you read any of these books, or are they on your TBR? I would love to know your thoughts!
Thank you! These seem joyful
Congrats on 4k subscribers! That’s huge! Love this roundup!