On growing as a reader | Reads With Friends
Five ways Jam Canezal became a more intentional reader
As Reads With Alicia grows (we are now a community of 4,000 book lovers!), I am introducing guest posts called Reads With Friends to share other perspectives on books and reading. These guests are handpicked by me because I have learned from them myself and think you will enjoy what they have to say.
I’m thrilled to introduce
as my very first guest. Jam is from the Philippines and credits her love for reading to her grandfather, who surrounded her with books as a child. She mostly reads backlist books, but has recently been more open to new releases. Her other hobbies include playing video games, crocheting, and travelling. In Jam’s Substack, , she writes book reviews and themed book lists. Her Let’s Read Asia page chronicles her adventure reading books from across Asia.
In this post, she writes about how she has grown as a reader to become intentional and shares the four changes she made in this journey.
With that, I will let you get on with Jam’s insightful words…
When I reflect on my reading life, I look back at little me not moving for hours reading one fantasy book after another. These days, I have to move every 20 minutes or I’ll get back and neck pains. Kidding aside, when I look back on my reading life, I often think about how my tastes and habits have changed over the years. Before, I would simply read for entertainment. But over the years, I began engaging actively with a book. I wrote in the marginalia, underlined quotes that stood out to me, and poured hours and hours into writing a review. I discovered how much personal growth can come from active reading. It helped me become more empathic and open-minded. Reading helps me make sense of the world.
Today, I want to share some habits I developed over the years that enriched my reading life and helped me grow as a reader. But before we start, let me just say that growth is internal and relative. What growth means may be different for me than for you.
1. I learned to DNF books.
When I was younger, I never DNFed books [NOTE FROM ALICIA: to ‘DNF’ means to ‘did not finish’ a book]. To me, it’s like the greatest sin a reader can do. I eventually learned to let go after so many frustrations. When I power through a book instead of DNFing it, I hate myself (and the book!) each minute I spend reading it. What could have been a good book to me ends up being a chore and a burden. It could have been a favourite if only I had stopped reading when I was not feeling it.
Because I DNF books now, you won’t see any books below a two-star rating from me. When it’s not good, I stop. This saves me time too, since I can read a great book instead.
2. I stopped buying books just because they're on sale
Nobody can resist a bargain. When I saw a book on sale, I used to instantly buy it, not caring if it was something I would like to read someday. My only thought was scoring a great deal. In turn, I ended up having a huge physical TBR that stressed me out. Unlike many others, I don’t like to keep a huge TBR pile because over time, it becomes like a to-do list. I get fatigued, which turns into a reading slump. I also didn’t like giving away my books and ended up having no space for the books I eventually read and liked.
Now, I like to keep just 3-4 books on my TBR and just go out when I need to buy more (which is a great excuse to visit the bookstore). I have also learned to give away books that don’t serve me anymore.
3. I make sure to reread books
A YouTuber who’s also a professor at Oxford once said that the real reading is in the rereading. I believe this to be true. The first time you read a book, you’re just getting to know a character or a setting. On the second reading, you pick up realizations that you wouldn’t have picked up unless you were already familiar with the book. Like relationships, the more you spend time with something, the more you grow closer. And isn't it wonderful to have a close relationship with a book? This doesn’t mean, however, that you can’t get anything in the first reading. It’s just you can get more after a reread.
I believe every rereading is a different experience. Sometimes different circumstances in your present life lead you to realizations or changes in perspective about something you’ve already read before. For example, the mantra that Miranda keeps saying in Station Eleven, ‘I repent nothing’, meant nothing to me the first time I read it. Come 2023 when I realized that I was a people pleaser and didn’t want to be one anymore, encountering these words again and saying them to myself tremendously helped me stop being one.
4. I now annotate and keep a reading journal
Just a few days ago, my husband told a colleague that me, his wife, loves to write all over my books. The colleague replied with a crying face. I would have reacted the same way years ago. Now, I love to write all over my books. It helps me articulate what I am feeling towards a book. If I don’t write it, it becomes lost on me. When I read a situation in a book that has happened to me in the past, writing my thoughts about it serves as a way for me to process what I’ve experienced. It’s also a way for me to react to something I’m reading. Reading is a solitary activity and because I don’t always have somebody to speak to every time I read something noteworthy in a book, I talk to myself within the book.
Years ago, I would have rolled my snobbish eyes if I saw a heavily annotated and tabbed book on Instagram. It seemed tedious and performative to me. Now, I put in sticky notes as tabs in some of my books. It helps me to find my favourite passages easily.
Station Eleven, for example, is my most heavily annotated book yet. Everything I have written in that book is so personal that I am ashamed to lend it out to other people. If my house was burning and I had to save just one book, that would be it.
This year, I took it to another level. I started a reading journal. Every night when I’m done reading I write in my journal to reflect about the things I read. I flip back to the pages where I’ve written some things and transfer them to my notebook. Sometimes, I write my favorite quotes in it or a new word I have encountered. After 30 days of keeping a reading journal, I surprised myself that I could write more than one full page in a single entry. I had never kept a journal before. Who knew I was a yapper on paper?
5. I let a book marinate before jumping into the next one
I used to be a fast reader. I could read a 300-page book in 2-3 days with a full-time job and a house to keep. Now that I annotate, keep a reading journal, and write reviews, I’ve learned to read slower. I also take a pause and let myself ponder about the things I read in the said book before starting a new one right away. I let it marinate first.
This came after I finished reading The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway. I didn’t have a good reading experience with that book mainly because the characters were unlikeable. After a little while, I realized that that was the whole point of the book. I wouldn’t have realized this if I had jumped to the next book right away and forgotten all about that ’bad’ reading experience. Sometimes things don't always click right away. Sometimes things take time to marinate in your head before becoming fully formed.
I’m Just Getting Started
If you reached the bottom of this post, thank you so much for indulging me and I congratulate you for having a generous attention span. I enjoyed writing this and looking back on my reading life. In the next few weeks, I will be starting something new as well—reading ARCs digitally. I am not fond of reading ARCs or anything that’s not physical. However, I understand the importance of reviewing ARCs in the publishing industry, so I want to start this now. I am also thinking of finally attending my local book club’s monthly in-person meetings. I am an introvert and still on the fence about this, but I am curious how an in-person book discussion will feel.
How about you? How have you changed as a reader? Or what new things are you looking to start in your reading life? Feel free to pick up these little habits I cultivated over the years. Or not.
My favourite posts by Jam
For more fantastic bookish content from Jam, check out her Substack, .
Hello again from Alicia
I’m so grateful to Jam for sharing her reading journey and helpful habits with us, as well as kicking off guest posts on Reads With Alicia, or rather, Reads With Friends! I have more lined up with lovely friends I’m excited to share with you. In the meantime, if you know a reader who would be a great guest author (including yourself!), please let me know.
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This was such an enjoyable read and very relatable, thank you Alicia and Jam!
I learned to DNF early on, and am an extreme mood reader. Most often a DNF is not permanent but only for the time being, and it helps me find the right books at the right time - and results in at least 3+ reads like Jam mentioned.
Over the years, I've grown as a reader by not only being more open to various genres (outside of classics and nonfiction) and recognizing that there's always something to learn in any book really, but also having a more enriching reading experience by interacting and engaging with other readers through virtual/physical book clubs, bookish chats, and of course here on Substack!
Amazing first guest post! You couldn't have picked a better contributor. Love this, thanks Alicia and Jam!